Justin Bieber Is A Faggot!

The truth hurts!

From TMZ:

Recently Justin Bieber defended himself during a laser tag match from a kid who called him a “faggot”. The boy had gone out of his way to corner Justin. He became frustrated when the kid wouldn’t stop shooting. Bieber told him “That’s enough” … the kid responded, “What are you gonna do about it, faggot?”

Bieber, surprised, replied, “Excuse me?” Sources say the other kid responded, “You’re a faggot” and then put his hand out toward Bieber and Bieber pushed it away as he left. Many news reports said Bieber struck the boy, but that never happened.

According to TMZ, it was the boy’s father who filed the complaint hours later, and evidently the father was heard at the scene repeatedly telling people, “I’m a lawyer.”

The police are still investigating, but as of now no fault lies with Justin Bieber.

We here at “The ‘Shit” not only think young Mr. Bieber is a faggot, but he’s a little bitch…and apparently, this other kid is, too. It sounds to me these little bitches got into a little bitchslap fight while playing a game of “Laser Tag”…which I thought ran it’s course in the freakin’ 80s!

However, like all third-world countries, Canada is always a few decades behind when it comes to fads!

Remedial Bullshit 105

Welcome back to an all new installment of Remedial Bullshit! It’s been awhile, and this world is constantly changing, so I’m here to teach you unstable fuckwits some…things…

Speaking of unstable fuckwits, if you’re one of them, then this instructional video is just for you:

This was filmed way before medication made some of you behave and half-way function in normal society. When this was filmed, they would just throw some of you in an insane asylum, hose you down, and feed you some sort of gruel day in and day out until you died. Man, I miss those days!

The Shit Is Hitting The Fan!

I love you all.

I’m back!

…and this time, I’m shittier than ever!!!!

Smile or the Terrorists Win!

After many complaints from various staff at my work, it appears to me that I’m not doing my job.

Sure, my attendence is good, and I do my job at the best of my ability.   However, these last few weeks many have approached me and stated that I’m missing the most critical step that could be the difference between life and death.

I need to smile more.

Never mind the fact that there’s residents at my facility that require attention and care, everyone needs to worry about whether or not someone is smiling enough.

I could go to sleep and wake up with two Megan Fox clones, eat a 20 ounce Porterhouse steak for lunch, and drive a brand new Prius to work…but unless I’m grinning from ear to Canada, no one will ever know what kind of mood I’m in, because everyone needs to know and think, “Yes!!  Look at that man and his sunshiny smile…his smile makes me feel like running barefoot through a puddle of rain.  His smile tells me he’s not a terrorist or the Antichrist!”

Apparently, this is a new world I’m living in where people’s lives are so devoid of anything interesting that they worry about someone smiling enough.

Maybe there IS a market for this:

Remedial Bullshit 101

Every so often, I’ll post educational videos and tutorials I deem “Remedial Bullshit” that will inform you, Constant Reader…things you should know.

Today’s class begins with what I had to sit through (and watch) in high school Health class.  This two-part film examines what us guys go through when we hit those magical years of puberty.